A call away

Maybe it's those earthquakes that make you wanna call home. Then again, you hesitate to call home coz of earthquakes coz it'll only make things worrying.

K finally finished his papers, and was in a surprisingly good mood on Mon. So good that I felt kinda annoyed that hes just beaming! Ok I know I'm psychotic but this peak season has been driving me nuts more than ever! It will make me feel better if only he could mourn abit w me abt my problems at the job, which he later realized and did.

A colleague J fr HK came over for a global prog, and he started me and M after getting our contacts fr this other guy fr SH.. Met up w him in the office on Mon after 101 hurdles o_O he's cute, not fantastically dashing but its those eyes that sparkled as he spoke, and his confidence that got me thinking damn for getting married already. Just for the record, i did bring it up that im married. Had a small chat and found out he needed some help w finding a place to stay in the mid term. Pointed the direction to M, and msgd M the moment I got back that she shd meet up w him. Which she did the next day, but told me some system error happened haha...

Was back in office in the evening w K, I really enjoy the small talks in the cab or on our way to the stn, and the negative PIG will unzip her way out and start saying "imagine what will happen when he's off this job, and to make thgs worse, it ll be just u and that guy u can never agree with!" *major morale dive*

Managed to catch up w J that same day, and I would say he's quite nice to have waited for me to finish up my work. Until he started to say he was worried when i didnt show up in the office on time (?!) We ended up at some Thai restaurant, and I think that sets the mood right. Chaotic.

I've never met someone like this before. Never. He's smart and good w words. But but the thing that got me very perturbed was that 1) he digresses off to unrelated topics far too fast too often, my head was in a mess after a short while 2) he bombarded me with things that I've never been told nor wld I think shd be said to a married woman, assuming I don't look indecent.

His questions and words left me thinking a lot. Not because of his advances but I was lost in thoughts thinking abt his questions and my own life. Are you happy in life, in your marriage? What do you think one should look for in a partner? What do you think abt extramarital affairs? Do you love ur hubby? Would you wanna have kids?

It all led to his other questions like Are you happy with me? What do you think of me? I will be going on a biz trip nx week, do you wanna join me? *among other things prob not fit for this space*

Things and questions that you don't normally tell/ask someone during your second meeting. His straightness and insanity did startle me abit but I didn't mind it. In fact, it really got me thinking, and worrying later. It's not him, him. It's just the recent me that I'm worried about. I think I'm an unsettled soul with no redemption :(

All these alphabets are driving u crazy. I'm not spared either so live with it :)

-

Sometimes you just want to put full concentration on the minor things in life, so that you dont have to look at the major ones.

Like problems.

Leaving

Not me.

Wondering why the nicer ones are always leaving.

The team from the other firm is happily counting down to the end of their engagement with the client, while we are counting up to no ends. It's quite amazing that we all come together coz of this job, went through pains and learnt together. It was especially true for me since I started this proj just slightly before them and was quite new when everythg started to happen in front of our eyes.

We had a good lunch together that day, 2 of us with the guys from the other firm.
I like how their managers, senior managers and partners mix ard with the team and cultivate a good team spirit, though these people are made up of staff from different teams and service lines. Looking at us, we are all from the same team but are very often left to fend for ourselves. Perhaps the grass is always greener on the other side huh.

It hit me that I'll feel lonelier than ever without these people, if it's even possible. Not to mention, there's a crazy smart aleck who makes sure life is anythg but easy for me.

But hey, I will work on managing u the same way I did to the previous bian tai boss I had. Watch out!

Just hanging on

Over here, I would consider it a lucky day if i were to have someone hold the door for me. Otherwise, I'm usually the one holding the doors. And I'm talking about the client's site here, while things get slightly better in the office.

Forgot how things were back home. Oh that means I should be back soon to pick up pieces of myself before they all get blown away by wind.

Been thinking a lot these days abt losing myself in this busy place. This place which doesn't really encourage the growth of NSPism. When the partner asked me to continue challenging my superiors, what I heard was to not lose myself. Or maybe that was a reminder to myself, coz I see it happening already.

Was pretty burnt out fr work last week, and the stress fr working w that manager didnt help at all. Came to a stage when I found myself trying to avoid him and having work related nightmares. I was just hanging on for Friday evening to come so I could work on recovering my insanity...

Friday afternoon, my partner saw me and asked if everything's fine.... I was so touched when he told me to drop by the office more often... Sat evening i had dinner w my hairstylist and she said i looked extremely down... Never realized it was so apparent, but if that's the case, why can't the manager see it? Maybe he's really numb or what...

2012/11/13 12:50

TBC

Just wondering..

Sometimes I feel like im pushing my limit so that they can take me off this thing.

No, I was just kidding. I love u all unhappy people.

小强传

因为我是小强，我不只会撑下去，还会越做越旺的！